i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize