batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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