she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
