My room smells like vodka and shame
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
i out mim tonsoeep
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