Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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