Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
So vagazzling was a success
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