Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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