My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
