No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
When did we convert life to cartoon?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize