high people should be assigned attendants
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
this boner is exhausting
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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