Betty ford says i'm here all night
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Randomize
