his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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