The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
