then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
why didn't you poke me back
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
