their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
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She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
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He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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