Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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