That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
that may or may not have been my penis.
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