I wanna bring you to show and tell
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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