hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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