Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
