cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Randomize
