Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
