omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
