I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
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If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
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I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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