I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize