So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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