Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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