I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
