I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
