Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
