Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
