I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
