playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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