For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
