And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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