we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I smell stomach acid.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
