does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
