so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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