I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Randomize
