Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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