Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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