can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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