I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize