He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize
