how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Randomize
