who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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