why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
