I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
