But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
