At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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